Photo credit: DFree / Shutterstock.com
Bebe Rexha has opened up about the moment she was finally diagnosed with bipolar disorder, after years of not knowing where her “weird thoughts” and “weird emotions” were coming from.
In an interview with Self, the 30-year-old singer spoke about being “fearful” of the bipolar 1 condition – in which a person can experience severe manic or depressive episodes for weeks at a time – when she was first diagnosed…
“It did kind of f**k me up for a little bit,” Bebe Rexha recalled.
“I was very fearful… I didn’t want to think there was something wrong with me.
“That was my worst fear all my life: going crazy.”
However, the singer was open with her fans, as she let them in on her diagnosis with a very personal Twitter message in April last year. As 5.7 million Americans are reportedly diagnosed with the disorder, she wanted to help people going through the same thing feel less “imprisoned”…
“I felt like me opening up to my fans was me finally saying, ‘I’m not going to be imprisoned by this.’ And maybe it’ll make somebody not feel imprisoned, in that moment, if they feel like they’re going through a rough time,” she explained.
“That’s why I decided to really open up and to free myself from that.”
During her interview, Bebe went into further detail about her bipolar 1 diagnosis, and referenced how she suffered from extreme highs and lows, as well as severe anxiety and depression, as a child…
“I would text everybody, and I’d just get sloppy. I couldn’t control my emotions, and I was always super anxious, and couldn’t sit still,” she recalled, adding that she remembered having “not normal thoughts” throughout her childhood.
“It made me feel just weird feelings, weird emotions, weird thoughts all the time. Not normal thoughts,” she added.
“I’d be in the passenger seat of the car and I would want to open the door and jump out and just get f**king squashed. Which is terrible.”
Bebe credits therapy and medication for helping her deal with the condition. Despite being initially fearful of its side effects, the singer credited the bipolar medication with helping her express her feelings, which has been particularly helpful when writing music…
“Medication has maybe helped me be a little bit more insightful and learn things about the world and also allowed me to be a little bit more centered so that I can actually write about my feelings,” she continued.
“It doesn’t take away the sadness or anxiety totally, but I feel so much better. It’s helped me live a more balanced life, less ups and downs.
“When my medication started kicking in, I couldn’t believe how I felt. I couldn’t believe that’s how good people could feel.”
We are grateful to Bebe Rexha for being so open – we can’t imagine how many people she has helped with her honesty.