It’s a big, lonely world out there. And it’s pretty much a given everybody is looking for that one special someone; someone to spend the rest of their life caring for – their soul mate. The dating scene is confusing enough as it is. Trying to catch the love of your life in the dating pool is like trying to climb Mount Everest without a support team – darn near impossible. One way to simplify the process is to narrow the size of the pool. Look only in the places you would expect to find the person you’re seeking. So, how do you narrow down the pool? Here are some suggestions which may help you in your quest:

Define What You’re Looking For

Any fisherman worth his (or her) salt will tell you to fish the places where you expect to find the fish you want to catch. Call me Captain Obvious here, but this is the first thing you need to do. Define the fish you want to catch. If you want shrimp, you’re going to have to go out into deep water and scrape the bottom; you want trout, you’re going to have to find a creek or river where they dwell. If you want to find a mate, you need to define what you’re looking. And go to the places most likely to find him or her; simply bar-hopping won’t get the job done. So, start looking in the places where the guy or gal is most likely to be. Don’t waste your time casting in places where they’re not.



You spend at least eight hours a day at your chosen career. There are unattached men and women in your office, who are probably just as eager to find somebody as you. Keep your eyes open around your colleagues. You have to be careful here – this is, after all, how you earn your keep, so take it slow and easy; a broken relationship can get messy, and unless you just want to find another job, you need to watch your step.


If you believe in a higher power, you most likely want a mate that does as well; church is a good place to find an unattached person who shares your values. Having a solid base is critical for a relationship to succeed. So check out the singles in your church, temple, or mosque.



College is a great place to find your life partner. Most everyone is either your age or within a few years, you’re all learning about your chosen life’s work (at least you should be!), and you’re forming the philosophies you’ll mostly live by for the rest of your life. Finding your soul mate is more likely to happen here than anywhere else, so decide what you want and start looking around.


If you have a cause close to your heart, you most likely volunteer to help out whatever organization is championing the efforts. You will find others who share your passion here, and it’s a good beginning for a relationship. Someone who cares for the same cause as you is more likely to share your life beliefs as well.

Narrowing down the dating pool to places most likely to have the type of person you’re trying to find is the first step in your dating journey. With luck, you’ll find the one true soul mate just for you, and you’ll have a lifetime of love to share.