New Year New Me. This is a phrase that we keep hearing from almost everyone whenever we approach a fresh year. This is when people sit down crafting and thinking about their new year’s eve goals. Most of us vow to be better than we were the previous year. Well, it kind of makes sense because we all want to better people. And very many people have lived by that phrase. Well just like most people, I am hoping that this new year will also bring out a new me.

Read on to find out why this year will be different from my previous ones…

My realistic new year’s resolutions

Letting go of the new year new me mantra

One thing that the previous years have taught me is to make realistic new year’s resolutions. Now looking back at the previous years, to be honest, I think I have failed miserably when it comes to honoring the resolutions I made for myself. So for me, this year, I choose to acknowledge who I truly am by letting go of the ‘New Me’ thing.

The thing is, after a lot of soul searching, I realized that much as we should have new years eve goals,  we need to also learn to believe that in some ways, we are good enough as we are. So you don’t really need to craft a new you. You don’t need to try and be someone you are not. For me, I think over the years, it has damaged my self-worth and identity.

When I go home for the holidays and meet friends and relatives whose lives seem better than mine, that is when I put pressure on myself. One of the new years resolution examples that I kept making was to get married and start a family. Now if I am to be realistic, for that to happen, you need a man and a working relationship. But putting that kind of pressure on myself made me appear desperate to the men I met which sabotaged most of my relationships. So that is the main reason I want to let go of the new year new me mentality.

Go easy on me

The thing is, I made my mistakes in 2019. And if I was able to go back and do things differently, I would have. But unfortunately, I can’t. Yes, I would like to be a better person. But I don’t want to be a different person. I don’t want to let go of the person that I am. I want to be better and still maintain my identity.

The thing is we can be better. And by being better, it means recognizing our strengths and improving on that as opposed to beating ourselves up with new years resolution examples like getting a baby when you have no one to make that baby with. This year, I am going to embrace who I am and improve on my strengths. That way, I won’t be setting myself up for failure.

So one of my ideas for new years resolutions is reflecting on my good qualities, making them even stronger and giving myself daily inspiration. I want to recognize the things that I can accomplish and channel the best qualities of who I am and what I am passionate about for good.

New year better me – I can be better without losing myself

One of the best new years resolution ideas is to just be a better person without losing my identity. So I have decided to change the new year new me to new year better me. I have my flaws and that is what makes me who I am. Those I can change, I will. Those I can’t fix, I can’t run away from. I know I can be a better person. But being better doesn’t mean that I become uncomfortable with who I am.

So, I have decided to look for areas in my life and focus on self-improvements. The best way to come up with realistic ideas for new years resolutions is to ask yourself if whatever you want to work on is worth the trouble. If the answer is “no”, then trying to do it will only lead to failure and you will continue beating yourself up after that failure.

I will stop comparing myself to other people

Whenever I went home for the holidays, I found myself comparing myself to my siblings and the friends I used to meet. And whenever I went back home, I would try and compete with them. But one day I came to realize that they also had the pressure of appearing like their lives were great. So they would go out of their way to put up these appearances. But when I discovered that one of my friends who came with this massive car, that it was a lease, I decided to stop comparing myself to people I only meet once a year.

The thing is, we all want to look better in front of our families. It’s human nature. But then again, you don’t have to go out of your way to live a life that you cannot afford. In the end, you will cave in under that pressure.

Make goals that are achievable

One of the new years resolution ideas that I noticed works is looking at myself, my intentions about the goals that I am making and asking myself if I am doing them for me or doing them to please others. Now, the goals that I have been able to achieve are those that I set for my own good. So always ask yourself why you are setting those goals in the first place.

So here are some things to consider:

Make your resolutions attainable: Set smaller goals that you can build upon over time.

Acknowledge what you are doing well: Stop focusing on your negatives and work more on your positives. Look at the direction that is going well in your life and do that better. Look at yourself through strength-based goggles and motivate yourself to making better what is already working.

Give yourself a thumbs up for all the baby steps you are taking: For instance, if weight is what you want to lose, congratulate yourself for something as small as going to the gym regularly. Always acknowledge that real change happens over time. Plus, just making the effort of exercising means that you are on the path of living a healthy lifestyle.

Positive affirmations: Now stupid as this might seem, positive affirmations do work. So every morning you wake up, try and motivate yourself. Make yourself feel like you are doing great and that you are making progress towards achieving whatever goals you have set for yourself. Being in a positive mood will give you more motivation.

I want to love myself

My new year new me theme is to love myself. Now we are human. And part of being human is usually looking at what we are doing wrong in our lives and focusing on our flaws. And whenever I look at the negative bits of me, I become unhappy and demotivated.

Well, my number one new years resolution is to love myself and to focus on the good. Now one thing I am doing differently this year is keeping a journal of all the good things that are happening in my life and being grateful for them. And even if I don’t find anything, I decide to be grateful for things like just being alive.

So this year, as part of being a new me, I decided to embark on a journey to self-acceptance. This year, I choose to make myself a priority and making time to do things that make me happy – things that uplift me. I want to celebrate even the smallest achievements. I choose not to be too hard on myself.

The thing is, I am not perfect. No one is. So I am choosing to look within me, and the good within me. I choose to embrace who I am and be grateful for every breath I take. I am a work in progress. And I know with time, I will get where I want to be.

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