If your relationship status or marital status has been single for a long time or have found that men always disappear on you all the time when in a relationship, then probably there are a few things that you could be doing wrong. Well, today, we want you to shift your bad habits to good ones. We have highlighted some of the things that might be working against your efforts to finding love.
Change your status to in a relationship by making a behavior shift
We all have our standards and expectations of what we are looking for in a partner. Sadly not all these goals are cute relationship goals. We all also have our flaws. So why would you expect a potential mate to possess all the qualities on your checklist? We have to be realistic. I am so sure that if any man or woman was to lay down for you a list of the things he or she wants in a partner, more than half of us will score less than 75%.
There is no perfect man or woman. Relationships that work are all about compromise. In life, you win some, you lose some. So long as the bad doesn’t outway the good, you can make it work. So how about going easy on that list of yours and be realistic.
Stop thinking all men or women are the same
Maybe you have been hurt before. This doesn’t mean that all men and women are made from the same cloth. Yes, there might be some red flags you look out for when you meet a potential mate. But does this mean that just because a person has one of the bad qualities your previous mate had, that the whole package is flawed? That now the person is just like the one you broke up with entirely?
See, most people stuck in the single status possess this mentality. This is a habit that needs to change. Instead of writing off someone over just a single flaw, give someone a chance. You might probably rub off on them the right way and change that. Maybe they have some other qualities to bring to the table that might make that flaw be something you can live with. Just give it a try.
Talking about the ex too soon!
We all have our pasts. And yes, someone may have hurt you. When you meet someone new, the ex topic should be a no go zone. Talking about your ex too soon will scare off potential mates because it will make you look like you are still hung up on them. Get to know the person as opposed to speaking negatively about your ex all the time.
Thinking online dating is for desperate people
Online dating is a platform that most people use to find their mates these days. The mentality that online dating is for losers is too dated. The reason your bar scene option is failing you is that the single people are opting to search for love online. They are not desperate. They have just opted for the smarter, easier, more convenient way to find love.
You need to rethink that stand of yours because online dating gives people a wide variety of options. Plus, the good thing about it is that you can state exactly what you are looking for in a potential mate. And you can use this as a search criterion hence making it easier to find the kind of person you are looking for. There are a lot of success stories you can read for inspiration. So if they have found success online and you are still single, who is the desperate one now?
No profile picture
So you have gotten rid of the “online dating is for losers” mentality and you have subscribed on a dating site. So why don’t you have a face to your profile? Does it mean that deep down you still think that it is a desperate move?
According to online surveys, people ignore profiles that have no pictures. Call it being vain all you want. It is just a reality. Attraction starts with the physical. So for someone to get the point where they are reading your written profile, something must have drawn them to it. And that something is the photo. It is not cliché when they say “A photo speaks a thousand words”. It’s reality!
The thing is, we all need to understand that you can find love in various ways. Where we go wrong is being too rigid. See, I might check the box of the preferred mate to be “20 – 30” years. Now, if the person that I might possibly click with is 31, I have already locked him out based on my search. One might lock out someone based on location, not knowing that they are probably willing to relocate. Also, the relationship status options you check could be chasing people away.
When it comes to finding love and failing at it, more than half the time, we are the ones working against ourselves. Some of the goals we have aren’t cute relationship goals. We need to learn how to change a bad habit that might be failing us from having a happy relationship status and your relationship status single might change to in a relationship.
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