When dating online, most of us have experienced our fair share of frustrations that come with sending messages. You compose what you believe to be the perfect messages only to find your inbox empty weeks later. So what kind of messages elicit responses?

Cosmopolitan went ahead and asked real men what kind of messages they REALLY wish women sent them. The men shared their expectations and gave insights on the messages that inspire them and those that don’t.

First off, men want women to message first. Much as a few women make the first move online, most don’t. Apparently, ” It makes me more interested in her if she puts in the effort to get the ball rolling,” said this guy Andrew.

Once you have set the ball rolling, ask follow-up questions. Men view this more as a conversation than an interrogation.

Cosmo also found that men wanted women to spice up their conversation. Apparently, they prefer one to write more than just a “Hi”. They prefer more stimulating conversations with one guy mentioning that he wishes women would engage more in political debate.

Being honest about what one is feeling is also something they prefer as opposed to ghosting (disappearing without a warning). “At least be honest and say you’re not feeling it,” said one. On being honest, they also wish women would be more transparent and straight forward about what they are looking for in a man –“If you are not interested, don’t bother,” said Josh, 23.

And if you want to keep the conversation going, reply. Apparently, if a woman doesn’t reply within 6 hours, a quarter of the men will strike her off.

So there you have it ladies…

The post Surprising Things Men Want Women to Do When Dating Online appeared first on Love is all colors.

When it comes to dating online , being too judgemental can hinder your chances of making meaningful connections with people. Nobody is perfect so its good to give people a fair chance. It doesn’t pay hanging on to ideals of yester years. In fact, for a woman, taking control and being the first to message a guy gives one millage online. That is one very appealing quality in a woman – a woman who knows what she wants and goes for it.

Below are 3 steps you can take to ensure that you are less judgemental and more open when dating online:

1. Show some vulnerability

First off, you need to ask yourself: “Would I date me? Do I possess the qualities I am also looking for”? If you can answer that question truthfully, then you will be able to change a few things here and there that can increase your chances online. If you expect respect and kindness, you also have to be respectful and kind to the people you meet.

You need to be able to put your guard down and consider meeting someone half-way. Vulnerability isn’t always a bad thing. Showing your feelings doesn’t mean you are weak. Accepting these feelings is one sure way to make real connections. So don’t write off a great guy just because he watches say Game of Thrones. Give them a chance.

2. Meet offline

Don’t rush into judgements based on the person’s text messages. So many people just can’t express themselves via text or emails. If the person is not far, meet them in person. You might be shocked at the kind of connection you might make when you talk to them face-to-face.

3. Give yourself a 3-date period

One date  is not enough for one to pass judgement as to whether the other person is worth giving a shot. Give things time to develop by at least going on 3 dates (unless the guy had some psychotic episode on your first date).

Most people may not open up on a first date. Make sure you meet this person outdoors so you can see their personality based on how they interact with other strangers in public. After the third date, people tend to be freer. And if there is no spark or connection after the third date, then its ok to cut your loses and move on.

Good luck!

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