Is it possible to identify the signs of a stale relationship when you are still madly in love? The thing with love is that the feeling can be so fantastic that it can sometimes blind you to the very reality of what is really happening in your relationship. A good relationship has to be 2-way. Unfortunately, there are times that it is not. One person can be feeling the love and the other feeling a totally different way.
Can you pinpoint signs that your relationship is going the other way? Read on as we discuss some of these signs…
How to identify stale relationship signs
Being in love doesn’t really mean that things will always be smooth. Even those in super happy relationships usually go through their ups and downs. So even those people we see and admire because we feel they are in a perfect relationship don’t have perfect relationships at all times.
The thing is, there are some dynamics that come into play that can bring some tension to an otherwise smooth relationship. Has the chemistry died down? Is your partner no longer enthusiastic about things you used to love doing together or you? Well, these are some of the signs of a stale relationship.
These things happen. Let’s have a look at some of these signs and how a relationship that has gone stale can be salvaged.
You are no longer as physically intimate as you used to be
When one spouse mentions that intimacy is dwindling or has died, one thing you will hear the other one saying is that “sex is not important in a relationship”. Well as much as ideally, we are told that physical intimacy isn’t important, realistically, it’s just as important as emotional intimacy.
When the sex dies or dwindles down, this is one pretty major sign that you are growing distant from partner, especially if you are the one who isn’t feeling the urge and is always making excuses not to have sex anymore.
Now I am not even talking just sex. There is usually just that simple romantic involvement like holding hands and cuddling. Such physical intimacy is a huge part of a relationship. Even when it’s not possible for one of you to have sex because of medical reasons, that cuddling and holding hands should be enough to show that the two of you are still in sync.
So if there is a dramatic change that has happened in your physical intimacy that has no rational explanation whatsoever, or things have shifted in a way that doesn’t feel normal then that’s a sign for sure.
Solution on how to overcome stale sex
The answer to how to overcome stale sex is to come up with new things to try in the bedroom. Come up with creative ways to spice up your marriage or relationship such as trying some sex talk, bedroom games, and be open to try out new things like bondage, anal play, and sex talk. All this will work if both of you are on board. If there is an underlying issue that is interfering with your sex life, then try fixing that first.
Lack of appreciation
Some things might seem minute generally. But in the relationship world, they mean a lot. When couples start out they are usually grateful for everything. Even when someone gives you that present that you don’t like, you pretend how much you love it. But you know what you say thank you, not because you are faking the gratitude but because it’s the thought that counts.
One of the other clear relationship getting stale signs is if the gratitude dying down or stops completely. See, when for instance, this person who used to pretend to like something suddenly starts complaining about a bad gift in your face. That ‘thanks’ that used to be sad because you at least thought of getting a gift is gone.
When you start taking each other for granted, when one or both of you don’t express or feel gratitude, then that is a sign of growing distant from partner.
Solution to lack of appreciation
Start being grateful for the little things. Sometimes, we just get consumed by our day-to-day stuff that we forget the simple little things that can make the other happy. Say thank you even when someone brings you a cup of milk and it will rub off on the other person eventually.
You are no longer good to each other
Whoever said that there is a fine line between love and hate, between being indifferent and being hurtful was so true. Now indifference isn’t so bad. Going back to caring from a point of indifference is easy. But when you cross over to being consciously hurtful to one another, doing and saying hurtful things as opposed to trying to be kind to one another, then that’s one of the relationship getting stale signs.
Solution to no longer being good to each other
If your partner is the one who is solely hurtful to you no matter how nice you are to him or her, then you don’t have to deal with a mean person. You have the choice to walk away. If on the other hand both of you are doing it, then the choice is yours. If you acknowledge that you are bad to one another and both want to shift gears and go back to being nice or do you feel that it’s best to walk away before things get worse, then so be it.
There is a profound lack of joy and excitement
Sometimes it’s hard to identify the stale relationship signs because you are deep into the relationship until that nosy or close friend mentions that you and your spouse don’t seem as happy or as close as you used to be anymore. You then realize they are actually right.
If you no longer look forward to being with your spouse anymore, then you need to stop and reflect on that. Seeing the person you love even after a few hours of being apart should elicit some feelings of excitement and happiness. If you feel apathy towards them, then that is one of the main signs of a stale relationship.
Solution to lack of joy and excitement
Mostly, this happens because the connection that you had when you first got together is broken. Sometimes, it’s because you have not been dealing with issues that they become overwhelming. If you are both committed to the relationship then it’s worth exploring what is going on. If there are things you need to talk about, talk, and deal with them.
Sometimes, getting that joy and excitement back is as simple as going back to the basics. Go back to doing the silly things that used to make you happy when you first met. Lastly, don’t be afraid to seek therapy.
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