So, the lady you’re interested in is a single mom, is she? That’s great! If you’re genuinely interested in each other, it won’t present a problem. It does, however, require a different approach from you. Dating single moms isn’t like dating other women, so toss your “Date Playbook” out the window and prepare to start fresh, learning from scratch. Here’s the short list of things you need to know.
Games Don’t Cut It
Single moms are busy. You think your life is hectic? Double it. Then double it again. Then double it one more time for good measure, and now you’re at least in the ballpark. She doesn’t have time for silly games, so don’t bother playing them, or you’ll get shut out, quickly.
No Spur Of The Moment Plans
Single moms can’t just drop everything and rush off for a fabulous romantic weekend with you, no matter how great that sounds. There are logistics to consider. Babysitters to arrange, and possibly visitation schedules to juggle. If you try to make a spur of the moment plan, all you’re going to do is stress the woman you’re interested in out. Don’t do it.
The Other Man
Lots of guys get hung up on this. They get worried that the single mom they’re interested in still has feelings for the father of their child. Newsflash – of course she does! They had a child together! That fact doesn’t go away just because they separated, broke up, or got a divorce. The thing to remember though, is that they separated for a reason. Don’t obsess over this. Just go with it.
Never plan a trip that requires you to make a non-refundable deposit unless you’re 100% good with losing it. Stuff happens. Kids getting sick is just the tip of the iceberg. Single moms are highly flexible and adaptable, and you need to be too, if you’re going to date one.
Ask About Her Kids
She’s not going to think you’re creepy unless you get creepy about it. Her kids are the most important thing in her life. If you don’t ask about them, she’s going to think you don’t like kids, and that automatically sends you halfway out the door.
Don’t Ask To Meet Her Kids
This is entirely in her court. She’s not just dating you because she likes you, she’s evaluating you for her children. When she’s read, and when she’s comfortable with the idea, she’ll bring it up. It’s not your place to do it, so don’t be pushy.
You know what single moms appreciate more than fancy dinners and bling? A man who’s willing to help out around the house. If she invites you over for dinner, help out. Take the trash. Wash the dishes. Those things say a lot about the kind of person you are, and make a big difference.
A Very Big Deal
Recognize and acknowledge the fact that when she does introduce you to her kids, it’s a Very Big Deal. Treat it as such.