Photo credit: DFree /

There has been a lot of speculation surrounding the downfall of Amanda Bynes.

From drug abuse to DUI-related arrests to announcing her retirement on Twitter, the former Nickelodeon star hasn’t been short of media attention – but now it’s finally time to get her side of the story.

In Paper magazine’s “Break the Internet” issue, Amanda Bynes has opened up about what led to her very public meltdown – and a lot of it started when she quit acting and turned to drugs to pass the time…

“I just had no purpose in life. I’d been working my whole life and now I was doing nothing,” the 32-year-old said.

“I had a lot of time on my hands and I would ‘wake and bake’ and literally be stoned all day long … I was just stuck at home, getting high, watching TV and tweeting.

“I never did heroin or meth or anything like that but certain things that you think are harmless, they may actually affect you in a more harmful way.”

And despite what has been written on the internet, Amanda confirmed that she hasn’t actually been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and her behavior was all down to drug misuse…

“It definitely isn’t fun when people diagnose you with what they think you are,” she continued.

“That was always really bothersome to me. If you deny anything and tell them what it actually is, they don’t believe you.

“Truly, for me, my behavior was drug-induced, and whenever I got off of drugs, I was always back to normal. I know that my behavior was so strange that people were just trying to grasp at straws for what was wrong.”

Another interesting confession was that many of her problems stemmed from her appearance – in particular when she dressed as a boy in the film, She’s The Man.

“I went into a deep depression for 4-6 months because I didn’t like how I looked when I was a boy. I’ve never told anyone that,” she confessed.

She then admitted that the pressure to stay thin and Hollywood-ready led to her abusing Adderall, which she says caused a “drug-induced psychosis” that was directly related to her quitting the film Hall Pass (she maintains that she walked out and didn’t get fired!) and ultimately quitting acting for good.

So what’s next for Amanda Bynes? After four years of sobriety, it certainly looks like she is turning her life around. A clothing line could be on the cards for her, and she even hinted that she might get back into acting.

“I have no fear of the future,” Amanda concluded.

“I’ve been through the worst and came out the other end and survived it so I just feel like it’s only up from here.”

We can’t wait to see what the future holds for her!